The last two weeks have been hard and crazy, and as much as I may have wanted it to, writing did not make the cut of priorities during those weeks. I mentioned in a previous post that I went to Nashville to help a friend and was there for most of the work-week. I left with a mix of emotions and feeling pretty drained, but immediately upon my return that Friday night, I got to work on preparations for my daughter’s third birthday party the following day.
Having the girly-girl that I do, I set out to make a princess cake and thought I did a pretty good job–that is until a conversation with my children following the party. They were talking about the princess cake that they loved, the one where Sleeping Beauty was standing on a mountain.
Maybe if certain little children didn’t smudge the intricate design with their stubby fingers, they’d know Sleeping Beauty was wearing a dress and not mountain climbing.
After the weekend was over, I spent Monday beginning the process of catching up on the tasks that were not done while I was gone. And since that left every task, I knew I had a busy week ahead. Unfortunately, I woke up Tuesday feeling like a bus ran me over–the worst sore throat I’d ever had, fever, aches, complete fatigue, dizziness–this sickness came out of nowhere.
I went to the doctor the next day feeling even worse and praying that I had strep throat so that I would be given antibiotics. Of course, the strep test came back negative. At this point, my throat was literally bleeding (I am not exaggerating), so, even though I typically refuse pain medication and anything that isn’t essential to healing my body, when the doctor offered something to reduce the swelling in my throat and something for pain, I replied, “Yes, please!”
I shouldn’t have. For the next two nights, I experienced what I decided drug-addicts must feel when they try to sleep. My mind was racing a thousand miles a minute, my heart was pounding, my skin was itching, and I was not sleeping. As soon as I would close my eyes, I would see the clearest pictures in my mind, but I wasn’t dreaming, yet, because I was awake. I knew something wasn’t right when I tried praying at three in the morning to calm my mind and started spelling out my child’s name for God, you know, in case He thought I was praying for the Caleb whose name started with a ‘K.’
I called the doctor the next day to let him know that I was experiencing those side-effects that were rare and serious, and lo and behold, my throat culture came back from the lab saying that I actually did have strep throat. Imagine that! I was never so happy to start an antibiotic and finally get some sleep.
While I have been away from the computer, my mind has been in over-drive. God has been working on my heart for some time, and during the last two weeks, He has been pounding me with new lessons. Ideas are swarming through my mind, and every time I sit to write, I am hit with resistance, whether it comes in the form of medicine-induced insanity or a baby waking up an hour earlier than normal, interrupting Mommy’s quiet time (I started writing this post yesterday). I want to make sense of everything that I am learning, from how I can do a better job of showing His love to those in the community around me to making a difference in places far away from my life of comfort, as well.
My hope is that over the next couple of weeks, I can explore some of the different ideas running through my mind on this blog. If there was one benefit of my knocked-down state last week, it was that I had plenty of time to think, and I want to take some of those thoughts from ideas to action.
I also had an idea for my first novel during one of my sleepless nights, but I’m afraid it might turn out like Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas if I write it.