by Jennifer on July 26, 2010
I love my children more than I could express in words, but I have to admit, I had been looking forward to this day for a few months. I didn’t know exactly what to expect for today, but I so relished the chance of having a few hours to myself without the responsibility of any children.
Today was going to be different. I woke up early, put on a nice outfit, fixed my hair, and applied make-up. I whipped up some pancakes for everyone while the house was still quiet, and I got together everything I needed for my day. I packed my lunch, the laptop, and a novel, and I noticed a spring in my step as I moved throughout the kitchen prior to departing.
I read for a couple of hours today, a leisure activity in which I do not get to take part for that length very often. I chatted with some new acquaintances and caught up with an old friend. Nothing about the day was extraordinary, but I took pleasure in doing the ordinary that had somehow slipped through my fingertips these last few years.
I rested. Sitting in my chair I could do or not do while I waited. I didn’t clean, I didn’t discipline, and I didn’t teach numbers. When I had to go to the bathroom, I went–and I closed the door all the way–and I didn’t hold my breath as I left, afraid of what mess I’d find in the kitchen. And as an added benefit to the near-perfect day, I got paid for my freedom.
When I came home, I hugged my beautiful children and stepped right back into our normal routine. But I couldn’t help but glance back from whence I came….
For the beautiful day, all I can say is ‘thank you.’ God bless the United States of America and our wonderful judicial system. Thank you Gwinnett County Courts for calling me today for jury duty, and while I know you don’t need me tomorrow, please call me on Wednesday. Please.
by Jennifer on July 23, 2010
Sometimes it’s easy to forget.
I look across the bed at my husband, tired from a long week at work, and recognize my own weariness. Weariness, a feeling more common than not. Talking has quickly given way to sleep. Who are these two people?
Sometimes I look back at those two people, ten years younger, and try to remember what initially attracted them to one another. It’s difficult to define.
When we were dating, our relationship was defined by doing. Every weekend dinner dates continued an early set tradition. We eagerly anticipated the opening of new movies, and we experienced music flowing through our veins at many concerts. We cheered at baseball games and yelled at football games. And at night, we were able to stay up into the wee hours of the morning talking and laughing until we would go our separate ways, waiting for our next appointed meeting–the sooner the better.
I look at these two people now, how they’ve changed. Physically. Emotionally. Spiritually. These are not the same two people from before.
Now, our relationship is defined more by being. We exist together for the same common purpose of serving God and our family, but the days of constant doing are few and far between. No longer do we share weekly dinner dates; we share a quiet dinner around the table after the kids are in bed. We don’t anticipate the opening of new movies; instead, we fight sleep on the couch to watch the ones that are now old. The children come along to those rare sporting events; my eyes aren’t on the game but on three little heads constantly moving in different directions.
I look back at those people from ten years ago, and I begin to think that they are more different from us than alike. I wonder would they still find each other attractive if they met for the first time today? Until one night when he opens his computer…
Ten years ago, he sat at his computer. I watched, tired and helpless, as he set margins, changed fonts. He took my words and made them look beautiful. He took my accomplishments and turned me into a professional. He made my first resumé without my asking, as a gift for one he might love, and I secured my first teaching job comfortably before I graduated.
Ten years ago, he sat at his computer. He set margins, changed fonts. I sat downstairs in my apartment, labeling pages, putting them in order, proving to my professors through those words and sample lessons my ability teach. Together we worked through the night completing this portfolio that encompassed a year’s worth of work and a journey. I didn’t ask for his help, but he volunteered for the one that he loved, and I received an A+, my final task completed before I graduated.
Five days ago he opened his computer. He set margins, changed fonts. He took my ideas and gave them form. I sat at my computer, made changes to my blog, this hobby now a daily part of me. He changed my changes, making them better. He took my words and made them look beautiful, my words that convey a year’s worth of learning, my journey. I didn’t ask for his help, but he worked for this girl that he still loves, his ways not all that different from when she first graduated.
And I know now that the core of these two people is not all that different from those two of ten years ago.
For this Focus on it Friday, I am thankful for a husband who has always wanted me to succeed, who puts aside his time to show me his love. We’ve changed, our relationship has changed, but the heart of the man who loves me is the same. For what this week are you thankful? Share in the comments or provide a link to your own post.
by Jennifer on July 22, 2010
How’s that for an overly dramatic title? No, this cleaning routine did not save me from a horrible addiction and the brink of destruction, but it did give me some structure. No longer do I have to spend my weekends cleaning like crazy (or feeling guilty because I didn’t); my weekends are free to work on other projects or just have fun with my family. So in that sense, starting this routine almost three weeks ago did change a small aspect of my life.
I am not one to use my blog to give tips or advice–more often than not I write about what I do wrong–and I especially do not count myself qualified to discuss cleaning. However, after writing my previous post in which I cited having a new cleaning routine as a benefit of trying to move, I received a request to share. If you are looking for a detailed plan which provides days for sewing and ironing curtains, I have no idea why you thought you would find that plan here. The legless dolly sitting on my nightstand attests to the fact that sewing rarely makes my ‘to-do’ list. You can find those plans on the internet, though, so search away.
Click on the following link to find the fabulously simple plan courtesy of Courtney at Raising Homemakers.
The best tool I have found to getting all of my housework done each week is a:
SCHEDULE
My 2010 Weekly Schedule looks like this:
Mondays – Menu and Market Day
Tuesdays: Toilets, Tubs and Towels Day
Wednesdays: Wash (laundry day)
Thursdays: Dust
Fridays: Floors
This schedule has been so easy to follow since the task matches the first letter of the day.
Doesn’t that plan sound easy? I try to knock out my tasks during ‘Quiet Rest Time’ when my children are rarely resting and only sometimes quiet. I am one who likes structure and tends to show discipline if I have a plan. Previously, I would tell myself that I was going to clean one room a day, and sometimes it happened, but other times it didn’t. Typically, the kids’ bathroom and other rooms they touched got attention, whereas Matt and my bathroom was neglected. Now I have a specific goal in mind for each day.
The plan is flexible. I am not completely insane, yet, so I try to avoid shopping with all three little ones if I can help it; Friday night/Saturday morning is when Matt and I accomplish grocery shopping. Market Monday has become Mopping Monday, instead. I vacuum all the rooms on Friday, but I save the kitchen floor for its own special day. Reserving only one day for laundry would never work since Chloe wears cloth diapers, and we signed up for the energy savings plan this summer that doesn’t allow me to use much electricity from 3-8 p.m. every day. I wash at least one load every day, and Wednesday can serve as a catch-up day for any tasks I didn’t complete on the previous days.
If you come over to my house Tuesday morning, the floor will not look mopped as someone will have already spilled milk all over the floor, the dog will have tracked in dirt, and the baby will have thrown on the floor whatever food she hadn’t finished. By Tuesday night, I will need to scrub the walls and floor of whatever bathroom my son has used. This plan does not eliminate the messes that kids make, but it does ensure that I’ve cleaned every room at least once during the week.
Cleaning is not the most important thing in life, but right now, my job is raising my children and taking care of the house. I want to work hard at what I do. However, in my quest to avoid idleness, I do not want to make an idol out of my home. The plan is not the law, just a guideline. If it can help you, wonderful! If not, don’t worry; I have no plans to start evangelizing the benefits of cleaning or this plan.
Join me tomorrow for Focus on It Friday! Start thinking about something from this week for which you are thankful, and come back and share.
by Jennifer on July 20, 2010
We took our home off the market this weekend. Our realtor removed the sign before knocking on the door so that we wouldn’t have to watch as it became official–we were not moving. I’ve not allowed myself to dwell on the reality because I don’t want to feel disappointed; I love my home and where we live–I just wish we could spend more time together as a family.
I hadn’t planned on doing a top ten list today; however, I thought this exercise would be good for me, would force me to look ahead with hope and anticipation. So here goes my top ten list for why not moving is not a bad thing:
10. A Clutter-free Life: Getting ready to move was extremely stressful and took a couple of months of going to bed after midnight every night to finish. However, we needed the deadline to remove every piece of clutter from our home, and as a result, my every days are clutter-free and smoother, as well. I won’t have to start over in a new home; I can enjoy the set-up of this one.
9. A New Routine: Keeping an entire home clean and ready to present any day of the week was a challenge, especially with three destructive little ones running around. However, I found a cleaning routine that works for me and that I can continue. I cleaned before, but my house looks the best it’s ever looked because of our attempt to move. I know I can keep this routine going. And who doesn’t like a clean house?
8. New Carpet: Our old carpet was disgusting. End of story.
7. Our Garden: For the four years that we’ve lived here, I’ve wanted to plant a garden. However, every year I was either very pregnant at planting time or home with a newborn and other children. The garden wasn’t a priority. This year, however, my whole family and I got our hands dirty, made memories, and grew the best produce and herbs I’ve ever tasted. I can’t wait to expand our garden next year.
6. Our Backyard: Our yard is large and level–perfect for three kids running around or driving laps in PowerWheels. In addition to being the perfect yard, the location is great, too. We’re located right next to the swim/tennis in our neighborhood. Part of our fence opens up to the path leading to the pool. What could be more perfect during these hot, Georgia summers?
5. Teamwork: Through this process, we’ve all discovered how to help one another. The baby is the only one who doesn’t make her bed, clean her room, or put away clothes. Our family is a team, and we work together.
4. Church: We get to continue going to the church that we love, 12Stone Church, and grow our friendships. And I’ll continue one of my joys this fall–leading with my husband another small group .
3. Focused Family Time: We wanted to move closer to Matt’s work so that we could spend more time together as a family, and Matt would spend less of his time in the car. Right now, that plan is not to be, so as we’ve been doing for the last few months, we’ll have to be intentional about our family time. And intentional time as a family is definitely not a bad thing.
2. Honoring the Sabbath: Even though I know God commands that we use the Sabbath to worship and rest, I’m not sure if the rest part would have become a priority had we not planned to move. After working so hard every week, I needed a rest on Sunday. And since I knew the weekend was our reserved family time together, I made sure I got all of my chores completed by Saturday night so that we could use Sunday to focus on God and family. I now realize why God commanded the Sabbath in the first place and wish I had taken His instruction seriously from the beginning. This practice is one I will ensure we keep.
1. Discovering God’s Will: The frustrating part of this journey is not knowing God’s will for us. We prayed about our decision before we ever put the ‘For Sale’ sign in our yard and asked God to guide us. If it were not His will, we did not want to move (even though we really wanted to move). I’m not sure what He has in store for us, if there is a specific purpose we are to accomplish here, or if we are just products of a bad housing market. What I do know is that if God had a specific purpose for us to live in Alpharetta, then our house would’ve sold. And while I’m disappointed, I will rest in that fact and continue to seek His will for our family.
I’ve linked today’s post at OhAmanda for Top Ten Tuesday. Head on over for some fun reading!
